We risk heartache when we choose to love. The choice to love is the choice to be vulnerable. We simply cannot love without sharing ourselves fully, and that is the definition of vulnerability. We WILL have our hearts broken if we choose this path. We will be rejected and we will experience heartache as we mourn losses due to death, betrayal and misunderstandings. Knowing this risk and choosing love is one of the most courageous steps we will take.
The title quote is my favorite from the training I attended in Texas with The Daring Way™ consultants & leadership team this summer. Brené guided us through the curriculum that will accompany Rising Strong, her newest book released in August. There were so many highlights, but this one really stuck with me.
When I speak about courage and bravery in the context of everyday life, I’m not talking about valiant acts of dragon-slaying valor. I’m speaking of the moments we choose to address difficult topics with the ones we love, with a friend or co-worker. That’s where the potential for heartbreak comes in.
What’s worse however, is the choice not to be brave… we stay small, we never speak up, we please or push away. In our drive to be accepted and “keep the peace”, we create the inverse effect… disconnection, isolation and superficiality. Of course there are no guarantees that our courage will result in what we hoped-for. In fact, we may actually get our butts kicked. That’s where Rising Strong comes in with new language and perspective for getting back up after the fall.
The people who love us do so because of our kooky ideas and unique gifts. Those who are open will relish our new ideas, and those who can stand on their own two feet will be inspired and curious. Those are your people!
Be brave: LOVE the quirks – your own and those of your people.
I promise, you won’t be sorry.
Link here to a recent Huff Post article on Rising Strong